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I once was lost but now am found

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My Story

He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not

I am so happy to be here to share just a little of my story with you.

As I prepared to share my story I was nervous.  I was thinking “Who am I kidding? I have nothing to say that is worthwhile or impactful. What if I get mixed up, confused or don’t make sense?  What if…?” But then I paused and realized that was the old me.  God, you are now with me.  I can do all things because you live in me.  I can be myself.

For as long as I can remember, I believed God did not love me.   For as long as I can remember, I did not love myself.   For as long as I can remember, I have felt unworthy of His love and the love of others. I felt it was based on my performance!  I rarely ever saw anything good about myself.  I was convinced that I was a failure to my parents, my children, my husband, and my friends.  I felt I had no gifts or talents to share.

Hi, my name is low self-esteem!

  • I am not smart
  • I will settle for less
  • I will not try anything new in case I fail
  • Fearful of making a mistake
  • I seek approval from others.  I would say that most of my decisions, actions, and ideas were based on what I thought wold do or say.  Almost everything I did was based on what I thought someone would do.
  • I have to be strong
  • I’m not good enough
  • I am a bad person
  • When people hurt me, I can do nothing about it
  • Please, please don’t criticize me, I cannot handle it!
  • I am not attractive
  • I have trouble saying no
  • I will tell lies about myself so others will be impressed.
  • I compare myself to others
  • I worry excessively
  • I am eager to please others
  • I apologize excessively

In a relationship;

  • I will put you before me
  • You can physically hurt me if I do anything you think is wrong
  • You can control me
  • In order to keep you I will compromise my morals and beliefs
  • If you don’t want me to have friends or family around me, that’s okay
  • You are right and I am wrong.
  • I have no say
  • You can verbally abuse

—————————————————————————————-

I was held ransom.  I had no way out of my life of chaos, disappointment, pain, and brokenness.

But…

God, you say you love me.  I have been told all my life “God loves you.”  I know that you sent your only begotten son to earth to die for me, and that He rose again.  And I know that is powerful, and true.

God has plans for my life, Godly plans.

How do you love me God? Show me, God how much you love me; I know it tells me in your word! What are your ways of love that I can understand and believe?

Click here to contact me and discover the rest of my story

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Welcome!

Welcome!

My name is Betty Cooper-Pauls and I invite you into my story. It’s personal. It’s hard. It’s emotional. But I share it because I believe I have something to say that will help others.

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Favorite Quote…

From Heaven to earth come down:.
He laid aside His royalty
I simply want you to be reminded that He was real. His sandals flapped when He walked down the road. His hair was misshapen when He awakened. He had to brush the bread crumbs off His beard after He ate. The muscles in His arms flexed when He lifted His little brothers and sisters. He had hair on His arms and warmth in His palms. He was the Son of God and the Son of man. Fathom the unfathomable.
~ Beth Moore

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